my name is liliana and i am brown, queer, gender-expansive, and middle class. i share these identities to give you an idea about how i navigate a community that is very white, cisgender, and upper class. in 2017, i was invited to join efforts to formalize various LGBTQ+ MeetUp Groups in Bend whose organizers were ready to pass on the spaces they created to new leadership. i hoped that i could be a part of creating social spaces that would be more representative of our diverse LGBTQ+ community in the region alongside another LGBTQ+ organization, the Human Dignity Coalition (HDC), that focused on advocacy for human rights. over the next few years, the LGBTQ+ community increased its visibility and received a declaration of support from the City of Bend. externally, Out Central Oregon (OCO) portrayed a positive and inclusive organization that partnered with many institutions - corporate, governmental, and nonprofits. internally, patterns of harmful racist, ableist, elitist, and sexist attitudes plagued its interactions with those seeking accountability. when i brought forward problematic behaviors and communications from board members and when the organization was called to account for its conduct, i and others were disregarded at best, more commonly, were demeaned and vilified and at its worst, OCO engaged the most oppressive tactics to respond to individuals and partnering organizations. among the greatest losses during this time was the dissolution of the HDC and their important work that was rooted in true grassroots organizing. in support of that beloved community, i would like to direct my energy to speak to us, the queer, trans, disabled, black, brown, indigenous, and collective communities of color. we deserve better we deserve to be heard that when we identify the issues and individuals that are causing harm in community, we will be received with affirmation and a commitment to address not just the interpersonal harm that was committed but to dismantle the cultures and structures that led to it. we deserve respect we deserve understanding from white people and allies when we give them a mirror to reflect on the oppressive and harmful practices that are entrenched in the places that they create and occupy. we deserve accountability to process harms with complexity and nuance, to expect resolutions that feel authentic and meet the standards of good relationship. we deserve authenticity to honor our identities and experiences, to show up as our full authentic selves, to witness each other in our wholeness. we deserve integrity we deserve high standards for values and care, to be treated and to treat each other with dignity and respect AND to confront internalized oppressions with care and grace. we deserve joy to be in community that we choose, to have spaces where we can feel and be safe, to be creative, to do work that feels good and brings us joy. we deserve rest in body and mind, healing and connection, to know that our work continues without our physical presence, that our allies will do the work while we nourish ourselves. we deserve to be resourced to meet our self-identified needs, to receive redress for our labor, to receive all that we require to honor our personal and community agency to create our self-determined futures. we deserve trust that we are born of the legacies of our ancestors that guide us, the elders that survived us, with relatives alongside us, and generations ahead of us. we have seen the past, are living the present, and will see our future. we can create and steward the way forward.