My American Story by Shani Clayton - Shani (Sha-nay) N. Clayton

Please enable JavaScript to view the full PDF

My American Story A contemporary tale of two identities. Freelance writer, artist and educator [Waves crashing nearby] It’s the sound of my alarm clock going off. Exhausted and uninspired, I realize it’s time to start my day. Another day in which I have a role to play. So I straighten my hair, Readjust the natural timbre of my voice, And leave my racial identity backstage. Holding back tears, I walk on stage and play the part I’m 14 LIV FUN / WINTER 2020 WINTER 2020 / LIV FUN 15 This is my American story. W hen I moved to New York of their hair, the tonality of their voice, and the spelling and pronunciation of couldn’t pronounce my name deciding of hope, charisma, self- their name. to call me “Karen” instead. expression and drive, ready to take on This is what it means to be a Black my next challenge: venturing into the woman in America. these experiences, I realized: There world of advertising. For years, I was When I listen to this song, I always is a tremendous lack of empathy, enamored by the dynamic culture of equality-centered comradery, account- the ad industry, especially the creative in NYC. So young and full of heart, ability and compassionate leadership aspects of visual artistry and commu- ready to take this new path toward in our American society, especially in nity comradery amongst colleagues. my career goals in the ad industry. the workplace. Why were people, like I was fortunate enough to dip my toe myself, having to shrink or hide our into the industry a few years prior as I was strongly advised to straighten identities for the comfort of others? an intern and later a full-time employ- my hair (at the time I had a mid-sized Isn’t there space for everyone’s story ee at an agency based in San Antonio, afro) to look more “professional.” My and identity? What are the root causes Texas. It was here that I had the great colleagues were also curious to see of such disheartened behaviors within fortune of collaborating with one of what my hair would look like if it were the top ad agencies in New York City. straight. At the time, it didn’t seem I befriended one of the account execu- solutions rooted in collective healing. tives there and would later meet her on this situation years later, I realized how discriminating this exchange was. Where Collective Healing Begins brief encounter would be the catalyst Why were my white female colleagues Our corporate systems and cultures for my eventual move to NYC two never asked to change their hairstyles? are built on education, economic and years later and the start of an expand- In Western society, natural African social structures that make it nearly ing career. Unfortunately, this would hairstyles have always been a hot top- impossible to crack the foundations later turn into a gut-wrenching and ic, and in many states across America, heartbreaking reality check, leading to companies still have the option to the stories and historical backgrounds my eventual departure from not only terminate or not hire someone based of minority communities have largely the advertising industry, but from the on the “unprofessionalism” of their been ignored and excluded from the corporate world altogether due to years mainstream framework and acceptable of discrimination. ideologies of American culture, lead- While my experience involved based on one’s natural hair. (Díaz and ing to millions of Americans having making the tough personal decision countless racialized experiences within that this was not outlawed decades and outside of the workplace. before. The ban prohibits companies We are now at a crucial point where path of exploring ways in which our from enforcing discriminatory groom- we must begin to actively engage in communities could come together so ing policies based on certain hairstyles transforming these systematic issues that other African American women that are typically worn in African around race whereby every person’s and women of color wouldn’t have American communities: braids, afros, history and experience matters. Be- dreadlocks, etc. New York became the low, I have laid out three key com- seen authentically in the workplace. second state to do so shortly after Cali- ponents I feel are critical to igniting this process of transformation: (1) My Hair. My Skin. My Tone. of being coerced into straightening my vulnerability (empathy + compas- My Name. hair for the approval of others is an accountability (unlearn- Imagine for a moment your favorite experience I will never forget; it took ing + re-education), and (3) allyship vinyl record player spinning the classic (community + unity). Incorporating tune “Four Women” by Nina Simone. in owning my hair identity. this process into our daily lives opens “My skin is black. My arms are long. There were a slew of other racially a new pathway where the experiences My hair is woolly. My back is strong involved experiences, including direct and histories of Black and Brown …” The song goes on, describing the superiors demanding I use a different communities alike are validated and experiences of four Black women liv- vocal tone to appear less “threaten- respected, allowing their stories and - identities to become an acceptable tent of their character or expertise, but clothing that would hide my curvy and necessary component of Ameri- - can history. 16 LIV FUN / WINTER 2020 WINTER 2020 / LIV FUN 17 1. Vulnerability (Empathy + tion for consistent and sustainable Compassion). is the practice of reviewing how one’s allyship. To me, allyship means being Approaching subjects such as race actions affect our immediate environ- able to see each other as one commu- Creativity at and America’s colonial past tend to ment. On a societal level, it involves nity while simultaneously celebrating be very sensitive for most people - cultural, racial, religious and sexual as it involves facing a reality that is tions have affected collective out- orientation differences. In the work- unchartered territory for those who - place, allyship begins when we see don’t have a direct connection to both. ing on race and America’s colonial every co-worker as a human being However, these are topics that must past, accountability involves under- living a human experience. be addressed for our desired unity. standing how our current structures African American women are often and workplace cultures, in particular, advised to dim their light in order have been rooted in a white-male, Eu- - vulnerability as “uncertainty, risk and ro-centric patriarchal system, leaving chal culture so as to not make others Communities no room for the possibility of a new uncomfortable or hurt someone else’s framework that incorporates the safe chances for advancement. (Cheeks, inclusion of minority communities. communities incorporate uncertainty, In order to move in a direction of to be their authentic self, at all times. risk and emotional exposure when it total inclusivity, we have to honestly Instead of erasing someone’s identity, look at how our education system has let’s embrace and celebrate them. We and professional settings? I believe it failed to transparently explain the his- all have something magical to contrib- Leisure Care communities across the country have become even more begins with embodying both empathy tories of both African Americans and ute to the world. Allyship is seeing the creative in their efforts to engage residents over the past few months. and compassion toward minority com- Indigenous communities. This lack magic in everyone and lifting them up munities. If we can take a moment to of transparency has led to enormous through support and comradery. Knowing that writing is a great way to relieve stress and anxiety, levels of misinformation and naiveté minority communities without judge- when it comes to minority communi- Vulnerability + Accountability + ment, we activate our emotional sen- ties, leaving ample space for discrimi- Allyship = Healing contest for residents to write about this unprecedented time. sors, exposing us to feel in ways that natory behavior toward them. The steps listed above are just a few we may not have before. This allows So this leaves us with the task of ingredients we can add to our daily for us to open our hearts to seeing how unlearning much of what we have lives that enhance our abilities to see our collective reality is not inclusive been taught to allow for the process of each other without prejudice. Incor- this poem summarizes how so many of our residents and for every American. re-education. I believe that we have a porating vulnerability + accountabil- staff are feeling as we patiently, but expectantly, wait for the From this realization, we activate the collective responsibility to understand ity + allyship = creating a beautiful, next stage, which involves account- every aspect of our past in order to alchemic journey that will not only day when we can all be together again post-COVID. ability. heal our immediate environments, but allow us to heal ourselves as well, 2. Accountability (Unlearning + 3. Allyship (Community + Unity) transforming society at large, one Staying at home Relief not tomorrow Re-education) Once the process of unlearning and person at a time. And by doing so, I Told not to roam Much to my sorrow Accountability involves holding re-education is activated and engaged, space for one’s vulnerability, which we have a much more solid founda- able to heal America. Wish I could see Just have to wait Someone else, not just me. For an all clear date. Sources: “Leaning Into Your Vulnerability With Is Second State to Ban Discrimination This 1 Chart” by Lisa Olivera. Shine. Masks on our faces Then we’ll open our doors Based on Natural Hairstyles.” NBC Women Describe Navigating Race and News. Pedagogy of the Oppressed by Paulo When out of our places Gender in the Workplace.” Harvard Freire Business Review. Retrieved August 1, www.nbcnews.com. Meetings on Zoom Say hi to our friends Advancing African-American Women in www.hbr.org. Read more: the Workplace: What Managers Need to No public places. Isolation ends! “A Hair Piece: Perspectives on the Inter- Know by Catalyst Research. Time to Take Off Your Workplace Ar- section of Race and Gender” by Paulette “The Troubling News about Black mor.” Medium. Retrieved September 1, Caldwell. Duke Law Journal. Women in the Workplace” by Leslie www.medium.com. “Black Women Talk About Workplace Hunter-Gadsden. Forbes. Stress and How They Cope” by J. Ca- “Black New Yorkers Describe Racism “California Becomes First State to Ban mille Hall, Joyce E. Everett and John- as ‘Inescapable’ in Quietly Released Hu- Discrimination Based on One’s Natural nie Hamilton-Mason. Journal of Black man Rights Report” by Ese Olumhense. Hair.” LA Times. Retrieved August 1, Studies. The City. www.latimes.com. LeisureCare.com 18 LIV FUN / WINTER 2020 WINTER 2020 / LIV FUN 19