2 ALi SA THE ODESSA BRi DE (A Compilation of Poems and Short Stories) ‘ Seun Oloruntegbe Appreciate life, Appreciate love, Appreciate family, Appreciate people Appreciation is an express route to exaltation ‘ Seun Oloruntegbe retains the right to be identified as the author of this e-book Cover design by Tanya Vakulchuk (IG love2design_ty) All works herein by ‘ Seun Oloruntegbe Use the hashtag #iamalisa to tweet and share your thoughts on this book and your favorite pieces Twitter: i_am_seunlight Instagram: seunlight 3 Table of Contents To the reader About the Writer About the Title 1. Alisa: dilemma of a pretty girl 2. Spring of hope 3. Designed and assembled by her 4. Alcohol the devil 5. And then she sobs and cries 6. Who ’ s to blame? 7. My brother, my friend 8. Too busy to pause 9. New day tomorrow 1 10. Enemy known 11. To my Momma 12. Strictly for him 13. Jack the dull boy 14. Gold digger by default 15. Factory setting 16. You ’ re hardly ever alone 17. Eighty nine and counting 18. Lies of a first date 19. Diva or coco 20. New day tomorrow 2 4 21. Religion of madness 22. Little red little 23. The black obsession 1 24. Run fat boy run 25. Beauty in the diverse 26. Trying too hard 27. The joy ride 28. I lost my way 29. A handful too much to handle 30. Fast food ambassador 31. No! Till 30 and single 32. Drive not the route 33. Black and gray 34. I love you 35. Old locomotive light 36. Alisa and the heels 37. The look 38. Alisa and the make-up session 39. Hit the road Jack 40. I ’ m fine 41. Smoky on a high 42. But for the passion 43. Let us move on 44. Search for the perfect 5 45. I know you ’ re lying 46. Pieces of us 47. Little red riding who? 48. African Deceptive Time 49. Fourteen 50. Beauty and the unstable 51. Daughters of Eve 52. Alisa you won ’ t kill me 53. Who blinks first? 54. The pissing tree 55. Alisa and the magical dress 56. Alisa the Odessa bride 57. How far behind? 58. High-speed chase 59. Broken car 60. Smiley face 61. Those people are a bunch of peasants 62. Vision 20-what now? 63. Dark skin disease 64. Three little birds 65. Alisa and the happy tears 66. What will they say? 67. The black obsession 2 68. I sighed and puffed at the sight of it all 69. I am who I am 6 70. Venus 71. Activist of force 72. Home is home 7 To the reader Since you're reading this it means you've decided to look beyond my crazy tooth-removing name and give my book a chance. To that let me just quickly say a big fat Thank you, Danke, Спасибо , Дякуемо , Gracias, Esé, Obrigado, Merci etc. It's been a great deal of fun and pleasure writing this book. It hasn't been without its challenges of course, but I must say I did enjoy every part of the writing, even when I didn't know what to write next. I've written this book from some deeply personal experiences and encounters, so you can view this as me opening up to you and us connecting at a deeper level of closeness and understanding. Most have been inspired by events (some of wish I ’ ve shared in the book), friends (old and new), my crazy thoughts and imaginations and some by the works of others. Some of my personal opinions and beliefs might have been reflected in some of my writings despite my best efforts in keeping things simple, neutral and less controversial. But I can't help myself. I'm a self-thinking, highly opinionated parrot. I probably shouldn ’ t call what I do poetry. I feel like my command of the English language is not profound enough to term me a 'poet' as I don't know enough big, weird and uncommon words to confuse myself and you as well. But I do know enough words to express my crazy thoughts in a simple way that you will appreciate and understand. Isn't that the whole point of communication, mutual understanding? I see myself as a crazy medic who stumbled on a golden pen that writes. I had to wait a long time to find the right ink that fills 8 the pen and get it writing. But once I got the right pen and the right ink, I just couldn't stop writing and making things up. I'm positive that you're going to have a certain level of pleasure, entertainment and reflection reading this book, and you ’ ll have a lot of laughing out loud (lol). I haven't written anything you don't already know, just in one more way that you haven't read before. Again, a big, fat Gracias. Do have a refreshing time reading this book, take your time to soak it all in, it'll be worth your while I promise ‘ Seun Oloruntegbe August, 2015 9 About the Writer ‘ Seun is a contracted form of ‘ Oluwaseun ’ a Yoruba name which means ‘ Thank God ’ or ‘ God did something ”. Oloruntegbe is a Yoruba ancestral name which means ‘ God is able enough to aid ’. He was born and raised in Ondo State, South-Western Nigeria. ‘ Seun is a training doctor with a knack for writing. He likes to exercise his imagination and express his reservations poetically, deal with emotions with words and a pinch of salt and treat them as what they are, a person ’ s state of mind and instinctive responses, and not the end of the world. ‘ Alisa the Odessa Bride ’ is his first published work. 10 About the Title Alisa the Odessa Bride seeks to capture the struggles of a beautiful young woman in the modern age. The pressure for perfection placed on her shoulders by an unforgiving society and her own personal desire to impress and be accepted by the people and society she sorely detests. It exploits the complexity of a young adult ’ s choices and his or her efforts to balance dreams and ambitions with expectations and reality. Odessa, geographically, is a beautiful port city located on the northwestern shore of the black sea in the east-European country of Ukraine. Odessa is a city that houses a majority of the women in a country that possesses arguably the most beautiful women in the world. Hundreds, if not thousands, of men travel to Odessa and her sister cities every year to experience the beauty of this city and its women. Alisa the Odessa Bride is centered on every day struggles, relationships, love, the burdens of expectations and the need for perfection. Also on pressing issues like alcoholism, terrorism, war and issues relating to my country of birth, Nigeria and what you could call my adopted country, Ukraine, and also women of course. What are we going to do without those beautiful, complex designs of nature? This book is intended to motivate, entertain and shine some light. Most of these might not make sense and it shouldn't, it is written by a crazy person. The sensible ones will be the ones straight from the heart. Enjoy the ride in the land called beautiful crazy. I promise you a lot of Awwwwws, Wows, LMAOs and LOLs. 11 Quoting the ever brilliant Chuck Lorre “ Tell your friends, family, co-workers, and strangers who at first time might seem threatening to read the book ”. 12 [This page intentionally left blank] 13 Alisa: dilemma of a pretty girl Alisa woke up in the morning with a smile on her face I woke up like this she said winking at the mirror Took a shower and quickly made a masterpiece of her face She threw on a white dress, only gently brushing her knee Put on her ring on the wedding finger like she always does Slipped into her favorite red heels ready to go She hopped in her tiny car ready to face the world Happy soul, free spirit, beauty of a queen Hello she smiled pleasantly as she greeted everyone Hey Alisa, happy to see you, you're as beautiful as always Alisa wears a wedding ring but she's not married She hides behind the ring to protect herself from the flirts She's dated a few men but it ’ s always ended in disappointment Men intimidated by her pure class and free spirit Now she's just immersed in her work watching the clock tick She's done everything right but never met the right As beautiful as she is she's not even insecure Mama's taught her always to be strong, pretty and happy Skinny, sexy and classy she could take her pick of men But the good ones are either married or gay 14 Alisa is not alone in her predicaments Her girlfriends Dana and Rita are in the same position They grew up together BFs forever Beautiful and gracious the simplest of girls Never puffy, superficial or proud Strange where all the men have gone 26, 28, and 29 clock's ticking on them all Strange where all the handsome men have gone Alisa has been with a few who were in love with her beauty But she wants a man who will love her for her simplicity A man that will still want her even if she was Precious 15 Spring of hope I see the tress live and green Filled with the light of spring Fresh from the harsh of winter Glowing like they've never seen lack I'm reminded of the mortality of life That no condition lasts forever Change is always around the corner For the worse or for the better I ’ m reminded to NEVER EVER give up Spring will always succeed the winter 16 Designed and assembled by her She's calm she calls she cares You say she's too clingy She nags she shouts she screams You say she's too crazy She's wiser than you will ever know She's just designed to sorrow She knows what she wants You're the closest she could find What she wants hasn't been made So she makes what she wants She wants you to be her make Designed and assembled by her She deserves the best of the better She has the beauty of Eva She possesses the fame of Sheba She boasts the courage of Esther She leaves you cry you call 17 She snubs you hurt you curse You now know she's so pretty Shame you could never see it She's not the one that got away She's the one that got away Away from the rule of a child Away from the like of a man 18 Alcohol the devil Alcohol the devil The enemy closest Death in a bottle The alcoholic ’ s evil bride Every sip a kill in the wait Sets you up for the big fall Makes you sleep overnight in the snow How do you recover from that? I can stop if I want Truth be told? You cannot You have a disease and you ’ re not alone A disease as old as man himself Physiology doesn ’ t lie Every ounce a death to happen A devil that captivates the wise Captivity of man ’ s own making No money for food, cloth or shelter 19 But the bank of beer never empts Dreams buried under the pool of Vodka Rising stars permanently stalled Doesn ’ t matter which way you take in The only way is down as long as you ’ re in But you don ’ t have to stay in your state There ’ s always a way out Funny story about this piece. I spent weeks looking for more inspiration to get past the first verse. On the day I finally got it done and I was heading out for the evening with my Fiancée, we ran into a drunk man passed out on my staircase, we both looked at each other thinking ‘ what a coincidence ’ but neither of us said a word. Sad coincidence, it ’ ll definitely have boosted me to complete this piece if I haven ’ t already. But it also reminded me of the experiences that made me want to write this in the first place 20 And then she sobs and cry She says she doesn't hurt She prides herself in her walls Walls she built of tears and glass And then she sobs and cry I wish you will be strong I know you don't want strong All you want is care and love And you aren't asking for much Please play the wait my dear Enjoy the rhyme of Shakespeare Peace will soon fill your heart Happy will surely come dear This piece I wrote for a hurting friend who had just suffered what I choose to call the ‘ black effect ’. The black effect is when white women meet a black guy and they immediately hit it off. The guy initially appear to be the best man in the world but will soon turn out to be a giant hole covered with ass