"Secret Not Secret" -5.20.23 - Michael Dean Jarman

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WELCOME! "Secret Not Secret" by Michael Dean Jarman *sorry for any typos, there are many, just roll with it, hey it's free right? What is "Secret Not Secret"? Why is it 270 pages long? Why is it in 5 different parts? TRY SETTING A TIMER FOR 10 MINUTES AND SEE HOW FAR YOU GET Answer #1: For more than 187 years prior to August 2017 millions of followers of "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints proudly referred to themselves as "Mormons." Since then however and with nearly 17 million followers today, the culture has preferred not to use the term "Mormons" and prefers other terms including "Member" and "LDS" instead. However, for the organization as a whole including it's trillion dollar commercial and financial functions including it's universities, it's peculiar privately owned law school, it's billions of dollars of stock holdings, it's land holdings etc… the term "Mormonism" is acceptable. That said, "Secret Not Secret" reveals an unprecedented case study of "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints." The result is an unconscionable but ultimately patriotic, third narrative for "Mormonism." This original, unique, third narrative is based on thousands of hidden, verifiable facts from the U.S.A.'s pre-modern times through today and is told from the fictional perspective of a fearless 15 year old female victim. This third narrative is the most comprehensive, factually correct, irrefutable narrative for Mormonism…ever. An open invitation continues to be extended to any historians who dare claim it is not. This is Part 1 of 5 in "Secret Not Secret" and is titled "The Book Of The Bone Fire Girl." It starts on page 21. The Table of Contents is on Page 11. The table of contents 1 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 includes a list of four summaries of "The Book Of The Bone Fire Girl" from other informative perspectives. A short video about "The Book Of The Bone Fire Girl" can be found on TikTok @GuvvyWuvvy titled "Why all members are victims." There are also other geeking out videos there shedding light on why all members are victims of monetized selective history and other unconscionable challenges regardless of leadership role or not AND that it's not their fault. Links to other geeking out videos including how Californians can save California by helping be become the next Governor of Utah and more about this including my contact information can be found at www.UtahDap.com. Answer #2: You should be able to tell clearly by now that "Secret Not Secret" is NOT AN ATTACK on followers of "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter- Day Saints." "Secret Not Secret" is personalizing, inclusive and validating. Here's 7 more reasons why… #1. If you are an American, "Secret Not Secret" includes an unconscionable but proud rewriting of U.S. History and the brave immigrants from places like Scotland, Ireland and England. #2. If you are a follower, a former follower, one of the many "followers fighting followers" or even a non-follower of "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints," Part 1 is also a shocking rewriting of "Church History" with a bright, patriotic message spanning more than 223 years. #3. Although some people will attempt to claim "The Book Of The Bone Fire Girl" is a misguided jukebox rock n' roll "parody" at best, it is more factually correct than any other version of American History or narrative of Church History that you were taught (even if "The Book Of The Bone Fire Girl" does have relevant '80's music lyrics sprinkled throughout.) So you can discover for yourself how few creative liberties I took in creating this latest draft of the unprecedented, in-depth, comprehensive, "fictional" context of the factually based "The Book Of The Bone Fire Girl," I have also made available to you hundreds of hidden links for your 2 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 comparison and discussion. Some of the most critical surface links take you deep within Brigham Young University's own hidden archives (legally.) This includes that 99% of Mormonism's leadership are related to one or more other leaders in one way or another (and some are related to controversial U.S. politicians going back several decades) but even with all this, all followers (and even the leadership) are victims of selective, cultural history purveyed to one generation or another and it's not their fault. Among countless other curiosities, "The Book Of The Bone Fire Girl" also shines a new light on: 1) Why for decades critical "secrets" involving temples are in recent years taught as "not secret" to the next generation without telling the previous generation; 2) Why "The Book of Mormon" has had more than 3,000 errors corrected while other errors were not corrected; 3) Why there is a 10 year gap filled with overlapping, repetitive, counter intuitive events involving many different people with many unique abilities, reputations and connections during a critical 42 year period in U.S. History between 1803-1845; 4) Why during this 42 year period the U.S. begin stalling at forming new states on paper after forming the first 17 states in the 16 years between 1786-1803; 5) Why only 9 states were formed on paper during those 42 years between 1803-1845 and why within those 41 years only two states were formed on paper during the 24 years between 1821-1845 (almost the same 24 years comprising Mormonism's published beginnings that occurred from 1820 - June 27,1844.). It's also important to acknowledge that even though this was all still decades before the civil war (1861-1865), the Nation had already failed because many parts of these "states" were already fighting over one thing or another, even the "constitution," and also had plans of their own. So did the surrounding Nations that already claimed the vast majority of the continent named "America" after Amerigo Vespucci in 1507 on a map made by Martin Waldseemuller. (According to most history, Columbus discovered it in 1492, 500 years after Leif Eriksson. For Eriksson, word didn't spread like it did for Columbus due to the more primitive time for Eriksson.) However, these counter intuitive events don't even began to scratch the surface of the eye-popping events you are about to discover. 3 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 #4. If you are a citizen of Utah or have been over the last 90 years, regardless of your affiliations or not, "Secret Not Secret" is a whistleblowing report revealing 23 invisible blood soaked daggers used for the past 90 years by tribalistic members of a private corporation allowed to hide behind the banner of "Utah Law" and be deceptively known as "The Utah State Bar." They create imposter parts under the banner of Utah's courthouses to target, to exploit and to destroy Utahan's from all walks of life for the financial gain of their tribe and themselves. To do this, hundreds of these tribalistic imposters are allowed to use these invisible blood soaked daggers by posing as "attorneys," "commissioners" and "judges." Every year, hundreds of these imposters use these 23 invisible daggers to collude in ways that include intentionally confusing and overwhelming thousands of innocent victims the imposter "attorneys" deceptively disguise as their "clients." They do this until the "clients" become so disenfranchised that in a regrettable moment the "clients" commit suicide and the imposters can invisibly steal hundreds of thousands of dollars from them (and their heirs) by adding those unconscionable amounts to the dead clients bill and then blaming it on the dead "client." If somehow the "client" doesn't commit suicide as the imposters intentional colluding, attacking and dragging unconscionable things on for years goes on, the imposters are still able to steal tens of thousands of dollars from the "clients." There are critical parts of these 23 invisible, blood soaked daggers on the "court's" website and "Utah State Bar's" website hiding right in plain sight and those parts are identified to provide you with another way to have no doubt that this is happening. (Archives of these websites have been made so if the imposters try to hide these parts of these 23 blood soaked daggers they can still be displayed.) These imposters use these 23 blood soaked daggers because the fortunes are so big and so easy to steal that they have become addicted to stealing except like Mothel Gothel addicted to pulling on Rapunzel's hair, for these imposters it is worse than being addicted to crack. They are worse than addicts. They are worse than serial killers. The horrific difference is that instead of using ropes, chains, clubs, knives and guns to kill they have found an invisible weapon. Even more horrifying, it is a weapon that people have been conditioned to believe is something that is there to protect them. They have literally, invisibly, "weaponized" your friendly 4 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 neighborhood courthouse into a house of horrors. They have plenty of marketing selling their blood soaked daggers as "medicine" too. There is plenty of proof and there are plenty of victims ready to come forward. Now you know what really happened to that targeted loved one who "owed their attorney so much money they must have really had a lot of problems." This unconscionable horror and betrayal allowed in Utah for more than 90 years is why parts of Utah also secretly have the highest rates of suicide, child abuse and financial fraud in the Nation as well as other unconscionable statistics. This is all found in Part 2. Horrifically, it is the "manufactured chaos" and actions of generational imposters that rope in talented, bright, once well intending students and turn them into imposters too. Everyone from the Governors office down for the past 90 years and even Utah's public law school and especially Utah's privately owned law school are to blame and there is blood from these blood soaked daggers on everyone's hands. #5. If you are a victim, a survivor or a loved one of a victim or a survivor of any of this, "Secret Not Secret" provides a guide to not just fighting abuse but conquering abuse and it's cycles once and for all. This includes understanding that "abusers" are "people who are hurt, hurting other people and hurting themselves" who then used their pain to make excuses to hurt other people instead of pursuing learning, growing and healing. This is reiterated by the opposite of that with the reality that "people who feel special treat other people special." This guide teaches how to conquer abuse with a new, proven spectrum identifying 55 invisible strings abusers inevitably use. In modern times words like "narcissistic," "sociopathic," and "psychopathic" have been used to describe criminal level, destructive behavior towards others but this guide shows that those are oversimplified words. It also shows how "abusers" can be people as well as parts of groups, organizations, "the law," "politics," and horrifically even as parts of regional, local and familial cultures. As part of this new, proven spectrum this guide introduces two new metaphors to reference the broader cycle of abuse that it identifies and shares. These two metaphors include: "Spindling" for the way a spider 5 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 spins invisible "strings" around it's victims to control them and then yanks on those strings when it needs to because it becomes addicted to yanking on those "strings" or, for fans of the Brother's Grimm's story of "Rapunzel," the new word I've created: "Gotheling." Derived from Mother Gothel and how out of her own pain she created and justified an invisible tower of lies to lock Rapunzel in and then demanded to pull on the "strings" of Rapunzel's hair whenever she needed to make sure Rapunzel was still in the Tower of Lies. This is Part 3. #6. "Secret Not Secret" shares a new positive cycle to creating what I am calling "The Heard Immunity" to suicide and other emotional health challenges. This combines two decades of research from fearless medical professionals with the insight the new spectrum offers. This is Part 4. #7. "Secret Not Secret" shares more Words of Wisdom including a new, sobering and hopeful interpretation for A.A. Milne and E.H. Shepard's original stories of "Winnie The Pooh" (not the "new" stories. Disney, call me.) This is in Part 5. Because sometimes "laughter is the best medicine" part 5 also shares some irreverent insight into a handful of well known victims of the spectrum who were publicly misrepresented as villains and somehow survived. (So…it's been about three and a half minutes and your life has already changed way better than if you had spent that time "scrollfesting." Did you set that timer for 10 minutes yet or are you still cheating?) Answer #3: "Secret Not Secret" is a free, unprecedented body of work and parts of it are still a "work in progress." Because I'm not a professional writer and don't ever expect to be one, use the Table of Contents to explore "Secret Not Secret" as if YOU are the professor and I am the student. This will help you better stomach my run-on sentences and topsy-turvy grammatical approaches. In addition to all this, many other critical topics have been allowed to go amiss in Utah and around The West under the current conditions perpetuated by the darkest parts of cultural tribalism. Because of what 6 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 "Secret Not Secret" reveals about what needs to be done in Utah and the rest of the West, "Secret Not Secret" also makes an irrefutable case for why I should also be Utah's next Governor starting with the next election in 2024. This is what "GuvvyWuvvy" and "The New Utah" is all about because too many parts are so broken trying to fix them would be a waste of time and new parts are needed instead. This includes a NEW "Utah State Bar" and new court processes transparently eliminating any opportunities for any invisible, blood soaked daggers to make anyone rich off thousands of vulnerable Utahan's experiencing divorce, custody, collection or eviction challenges out of no fault of their own every year. Challenges that as they are addressed appropriately will also make everything better every community and neighborhood as a whole and especially for fearless law enforcement and emergency responders in those communities. When it comes to all this some of the many solutions include: guaranteeing the safe air supply for millions of people in Utah and The West by absolutely building that pipeline from the Pacific Ocean to the Great Salt Lake and to fill other inland basins regardless of how much snow The West gets in some winters. Cloudseeding in other parts of the earth is a real thing and continues to affect weather patterns in Utah and the West in previously unimaginable ways; a WAY better plan than a gondola for little Cottonwood Canyon and surrounding resorts that includes Utah taking the mountain resort industry back in bigger and better ways instead of giving it away to outside interests looking to overfill bank accounts by crippling canyon roads and lifts with impossible, overcapacity numbers of people; my 6 year personal quest to keep all of us inspired in different ways by naming the new Salt Lake International Airport after Robert Redford; enabling kids, educators and willing communities in new ways with more sensible use of expensive school buildings up to 12 hours a day/7 days a week; Utah having it's own "Surgeon General" (just like California does) to see to it that abuse awarness and other materials for conquering abuse are available in age appropriate ways at elementaries, junior highs, high schools, colleges, work places and beyond (Disney did you lose your phone?); creating a NEW "Utah State Bar" under new guidelines and letting the current one just rot away because it is beyond reproach or repair; beautifying billboard 7 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 messages or eliminating billboards altogether in a creative way so that our communities don't have to be burdened with the primitve messages billboards thrive on; eliminating homelessness in Utah, in The West and in the rest of the U.S. by initiating a triple purpose multi-state facility that will serve as a model for other, equally capable states (don't worry there's plenty of cash already there to pay for it many times over but it will also pay for itself many times over in it's new, triple function.) If you really do want to "drain the swamp" (and I think you do,) and save Utah, California and other Western states in the process, I demonstrate in previously unimaginable ways where the plugs in the swamp are and how to pull them and it starts with a big, tall, bald, geeky guy named Michael Dean Jarman not your ranting, raving, schill keeping you so in love or so angry with Washington D.C. that you forget to look beyond Washington D.C. Remember America is still being founded everyday and without "divide and conquer" keeping everyone loving or hating Washington D.C. the "medicine" is already in our hands. Because of that, maybe for the broken, misinterpreted, sensationalized systems of Utah and the U.S.A. instead of "Republican," "Democrat," "Green," "Libertarian" or other traditional, convoluted, out-of-date names the symbol for this political movement should be "Rx" because "Rx" represents "medicine." Because I'm a geek about all this as you can probably tell by now, I also believe that Utah's current Governor Spencer Cox will give me his endorsement for me being governor starting in 2025. Contributing to this belief is because in recent years it has become apparent that he has other talents, abilities and concerns that if he is given the freedom to cultivate and pursue, he will do inspiring things with and that will be rewarding for Utah's people and diverse cultures of all ages in many ways (even though he too is quietly a member of the deceptive "Utah State Bar" and has been shortsightedly forced to do things in his roles as Lieutenant Governor for 8 years and now as Governor for 2 years that I'm sure he regrets.) The rocket ship to conquering these challenges at all elevations in Utah gravitates around what Utah has been, what Utah is and what Utah can be for it's 3.2 million full-time residents, for it's hundreds of thousands of part-time residents, for more than 10 million visitors every year (and 8 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 growing), for the rest of the U.S.A. and for the globe (whether or not that rocket ship needs roads.) It's very cool that you are willing to be a part of this ongoing conversation. As far as this PDF goes, there will also, always be typos so just roll with it. I promise. It's crazy how much time it takes just to reconcile and confirm facts, add a few sentences somewhere, adjust pages, adjust page numbers, blah blah blah…then redo it all a few days later because something new was discovered only to redo it again eventually anyway. I can't imagine how they managed to publish even one book let alone hundreds of thousands of books on two different continents before 1820. In those times with all those additional challenges, the abilities of people like James Fenimore Cooper, the author of "The Last of the Mohicans" and the author of 50 other published books and some unpublished books, Benjamin Franklin (with his many pseudonyms all having a different eyebrow raising purpose) and Henri Le Rennet and others must have been superhuman. For "quotable quotes" used in this version of "Secret Not Secret", I didn't reveal the names of who they are credited to for several reasons. This is because some of them are by me and if you're really interested in who is "credited" with a quote a search for it will bring other rewarding opportunities for curiosity, discovery and surprise. (Like in the case of Shakespeare how one credited quote might imply something very different than what is lesser known to be believed about him and the previously accepted, pre-modern sources of a few of his most popular stories.) I'm also more of concept and research geek rather than a "w-r-i-t-e-r" but I also believe in exploring new challenges. Because of that (attempting) to put this five-part body of work together pro bono under circumstances very far from ideal as well as other overwhelming challenges that I never could have imagined, has been a lot of emotional and intellectual heavy lifting for me for an overwhelmingly unpredictable amount of time and I'm proud to say that. Because of that, the experience to get to this part of the journey has transformed me in ways that I never could have imagined and that I am very grateful for. If you're lucky, this body of work will challenge you in new ways too and hopefully the additional resources available will result in endless self- congratulations and some virtual mid-sentence fist-bumps between us (aka 9 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 "daps") until one day we can meet. (Plan on it for my inauguration to be Utah's next GuvvyWuvvy starting on Monday, January 6, 2025) My apologies if in my geeking out I seem a little rough around the edges at times as you explore this guide because I'm sure the combination of all this on me shows at times even though I've tried to keep it "PG" rated which is hard because although I'm a geek I've also worked some of the roughest jobs the West can offer at times and "colorful language" and other antics in those jobs is part of staying positive by antagonizing each other with it all at times. I also have a cowboy uncle who is a verbal-ten-ton- automatic-shotgun of a wordsmith and who I know could keep even Mark Twain wordstruck at the drop of a hat and there are plenty of lessons I learned as a kiddo from being around him (some better than others.) Even though this body of work is still a "work-in-progress" (and probably always will be) it was important to me to start releasing it here regardless of imperfections because of who will benefit from it (a.k.a. kiddos of all ages.) Hopefully you knowing this helps shine a light on why parts might seem less-than-polished. Although there is still some more equipment to choose regarding parts of this, the game plan is in place and that is thrilling. There are also dozens of resources created by others that this body of work couldn't have been created without and whose creators I look forward to acknowledging more specifically in future editions as a result of communicating with them (or their descendants) as this work continues. There is also a lot of work to still be done with you, my "profess-or," being invited to help navigate it in new ways. (Hey who doesn't love a good accidental double entendre right?) As you explore "Secret Not Secret," remember… "If an angry person picks up a sword their life will soon end and they will be forgotten. If an angry person picks up a candle, a ruler and a pencil, their life will soon begin and they will be remembered." "When a person knows their enemies better than their enemies know themselves, they no longer have enemies, they have opportunities." 10 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 "The truth is like a lion, you don't have to defend it. Let it loose and it will defend itself." TABLE OF CONTENTS ****** Invitations regarding the bright truths shared in this body of work. Pages: 12-20 ****** PART ONE: "The Book Of The Bone Fire Girl" Page: 21-112 *Regarding those different, short, surface summaries of "The Book of The Bone Fire Girl." Four of them from different perspectives ranging from 2-9 pages each can be found starting on page 245 ****** PART TWO: "The Destruction, the Devastation and the Course Correction" (Early 1900's through today) Page: 90 "23 Invisible Daggers" Page: 110 ****** PART THREE: "A Grain of Salt To Trade For Anything" (Including the list of 55 abuses) Page: 150 ****** PART FOUR: "The Marvelous Works and The Wonder" (Including how to create "The Heard Immunity" to suicide, to other Emotional Health Challenges and to other tragedies.) Page: 209 11 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 ****** PART FIVE: "More Words Of Wisdom" Page: 220 A NOTE REGARDING ETIQUETTE FOR FOLLOWERS OF "THE CHURCH OF JESUS CHRIST OF LATTER-DAY SAINTS (FORMERLY REFERRED TO AS "MORMONS") AND THE AUTHOR'S USE OF THE WORD "MORMONISM" AS OPPOSED TO "MORMON" Out of respect to that preference and to minimize any chances for confusion or suspicion of ill will about all this, it needs to be noted that the use of the word "Mormonism" is in reference to the entire organization including more than a dozen corporations as well as the entire organization's past, present and future functions not just it's cultural functions. Hopefully (and for many reasons), the use of the term Mormonism for this purpose is fair and understandable. Because this guide is available globally and because of what it reveals about certain parts of Mormonism and how that may affect victims from all walks of life, especially those vulnerable young men and women serving as missionaries, it's important to remember, "an ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure." This is important when it comes to protecting them from potential opportunists. If you are a follower and all this sounds a little overwhelming, keep going! You will discover "pounds of cure" for yourself, your loved ones, your neighbors and your community. ****** THIS GUIDE AND THE HIDDEN LINKS TO VERIFY ALL THIS Because you may have discovered parts of this in paper that someone printed off and shared in one way or another, the entirety of "Secret Not Secret" can be found online at www.PDFHost.io by searching "Secret Not Secret" for the most recent version. (Between October 2022 and May 2023, five previous versions have had more than 12,000 downloads combined.) 12 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 Because "links" won't work from PDFHost.io, and that's the best place to share this PDF for now, the links to hundreds of resources (and my contact information for group discussion or professional inquiries) can be found at www.UtahDap.com. There you can find: an invitation to play a critical role in seeing several of the new causes this body of work introduces come to fruition, a link to hundreds of resources I discovered and pieced together for this, a link to the latest version of "Secret Not Secret" and some of my many geeking out attempts at sharing parts of this over the years. (Yup, I really did that…and that…and that…and it's all still on youtube because it's part of this part of the story and because I'm a proud geek.) For now, other relevant domains highlighted in this guide should point you directly to one of these two pages until those links can be developed into their intended entities. AN INVITATION TO ALL OFFICIAL AND UNOFFICIAL L.D.S. HISTORIANS AND U.S. HISTORIANS ESPECIALLY AT OXFORD, EDINBURGH, COLUMBIA UNIVERSITY NEW YORK, HARVARD, BRIGHAM YOUNG UNIVERSITY AND SUNSET VIEW ELEMENTARY These pages represent a body of work including future publications, documentaries, films, websites, podcasts, support groups and more presented in part with an intricate, elaborate, original context catalyzed by the author's office. This context has been catalyzed from hidden history, forgotten history, claimed history and discrepancies discovered, intuited or otherwise brought to light through the author's office. L.D.S. historians, U.S. historians, influencers and others of any persuasion and including any of the dozens of sanctioned and unsanctioned organizations including "FARMS", "FAIR" and others who may politely disagree with any part deemed critical to the overall context the author's office has catalyzed for "SECRET NOT SECRET" INCLUDING "THE BOOK OF THE BONE FIRE GIRL" or any other part of this guide are extended a continued invitation for polite and public discussion regarding this body of work. 13 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 EMERGENCY RESOURCES If you are one of the millions of victims of these certain parts of Mormonism or are one of the hundreds of thousands of descendants of any of the people represented in The Book of The Bone Fire Girl, please do not take any of this personally as you may have been conditioned to do. Remember, this is not about blame mongering. This is about conversation starting and discovering blossoms of healing and learning. Until more specific support groups are created en mass in to aid in this rewarding process for everybody, outside resources for help for now include dialing the 988 Crisis Lifeline or going to www.988lifeline.org. Another resource is www.StopItNow.org. Click on "Help and Guidance" near the top, then click on "Library of Resources" and under the "Quick Links" click on "Crisis Hotlines." Remember to pursue at least 2 or 3 resources so you can be enabled with more than one to discover what will work for you. Consider looking for other resources online using similar key words including the local area as well as working with established community resources to organize support groups in public buildings where available. CONQUERING THE REVERBERATING STRINGS OF ABUSE, THE DEPERSONALIZING ECHO CHAMBERS THAT FOLLOW AND THE MALADAPTIVE FALSE COMFORTERS THEY GIVE RISE TO (a.k.a. "Staging for the adventure," "A well stocked base camp," "Being prepared is an opportunity to feel smart.") When it comes the new, proven spectrum of abuse known as "Spindling" or "Gotheling" it could also be referred to as "55 Signs You're In An Abusive Relationship With An Imposter, a Hijacker or An Imitator." 14 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 In addition to everything else an abuser can be, intentionally or unintentionally, an abuser can also be yourself towards yourself, intentionally or unintentionally. This is because regardless of where the reverberating strings of those 55 abuses come from, out of no fault of your own, parts of your brain can sometimes be deceived into responding in many deceptive ways including creating depersonalizing echo chambers and then maladaptive false comforters to attempt to appease those depersonalizing echo chambers. Don't let this happen because these non-sustainable false comforters can sometimes be self-destructive, self-deceiving nightmares that lead to many other overwhelming challenges out of no fault of your own. The abuses, the depersonalizing echo chambers and the maladaptive false comforters are imposters, hijackers and imitators. Some false comforters are exponentially more deceptive than others. This includes any of the "emotional health challenges" oversimplified with shortsighted words like "disorders" or other acronyms including: "obsessive compulsive behavior," "anxiety," "hoarding," "bi-polar," "borderline personality," "anorexia," "bulimia," "homesickness," "ADD," "ADHD," and on and on. They all start with those imposters, hijackers and imitators. These also includes resentment, jealousy, misplaced anger, fear, doubt, self-serving sorrow (as opposed to sorrow promoting learning, growing or action), comparing to others, being offended, taking anything personally, confirmation bias, projecting, "turning the other cheek," (some that are disguised forms of self-destructive self-righteousness because there is a more rewarding way), what is sometimes labeled by parts of emotional healthcare as the responses of "freezing, fleeing or fighting" and even abusing others as an invisible but now diminishable, internal, maladaptive addiction. They are all imposters, hijackers and imitators. "That which you allow to anger you, you also give the power to be your master." Conversations regarding what other maladaptive false comforters are will fill volumes. 15 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 Conversations about what aren't false comforters will also fill many volumes. (An example of something that isn't a false comforter is invited fear that may be from an adventure, an accepted challenge, etc…) With this spectrum and the awareness, intervention and empowerment that comes with it, instead of being deceived by those imposters, hijackers and imitators there is something else. There is a more rewarding way. It is something you already know how to do but different challenges contributed to you being temporarily overwhelmed and not doing it. There isn't one word to describe it and to aid in conversation I'll share some notes about it. I'm sure you'll have plenty of notes of your own too. This is partly because instead of that "defining" with those oversimplified, shortsighted words, it is a type of "refining." One way to describe it is instead of "freezing, fleeing or fighting" it is "flipping the script." It is more than that though, it is striking a match to that false script. It is turning the page on the notes of that frigid, false script and letting the warmth of the notes of your own music echo and comfort instead. It is stopping that flood and vaporizing it. It is taking the shade off the light. It is seeding and re-seeding. It is personalizing. It is repersonalizing. It is radiant. It is radiating. It is radiantly radiating. It is not just that "fire" that burns the old and warms anew as it does, it is that "white fire" that creates. It is igniting. It is breathing. It is maneuvering. It is learning. It is teaching. It is applauding. It is cheering. It is that first water. It is that first medicine, that first "Rx." It is enabling all these beautiful special wonders and more beautiful, special wonders in beautiful, special, reciprocating ways. Wonderful, special wonders that have been impostered, hijacked and imitated for far too long. For trauma geeks, it also includes the brilliantly dynamic spectrum of physiological topics that include oxytocin, dopamine and endorphins, 16 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 adrenaline and cortisol relating in independent or reciprocating ways as part of a spectrum that includes aphrodisiac and non-aphrodisiac topics. This includes how in different ways different physiologies may produce and process all of these internal "components" at different levels at different times in independent or reciprocating ways producing different reactions and experiences and it's no ones fault because they are now identifiable. Rather than being described as a path or a line, the reverberating strings that make up the spectrum and cycles of abuse seem to be better visualized as a spinning spindle shaped like an inverted cone (a funnel.) This peculiar spindle also helps visualize a more challenging part of the spectrum that without awareness and intervention abusers become overwhelmed and entangled in as they begin combining abuses and targeting and abusing victims in worse ways. I call these depths of the cone "The-Funnel-Of-No-Return." This includes: the abuser becoming warpedly, derangedly addicted to self-destructive, maladaptive, physiological reactions within themselves and doing other self-destructive things to appease those internal addictions (a false comforter); developing non-sustainable addictions to outside chemical substances (drugs, alcohol, etc…another false comforter); the abuser ending up in prison from their abuses towards others growing worse and worse and them finally getting caught no matter how unconscionable their lies or actions become; or them ending up dead as a consequences of all or part of all this. To overcome this "Death Spiral" and vaporize the cone and let those other special wonders take it's place, abusers just need to pursue awareness and intervention before it's too late, and there's a powerful reason for this: that reason that they started as victims too. To attempt to lessen the burden of referencing this cone that is the spectrum of abuses with it's 55 reverberating strings of abuse and worse when the abuser combines abuses, I am referring to the spectrum as the "Spindling Cone of Invisible Strings, Addictions, Abuses and Horrors" (aka "SCISAAHS"). Yes, another metaphor as if two weren't enough already. This is because knowing about this spectrum really is like a pair of "scissors." It not only cuts those reverberating strings of abuse and allows victims to 17 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 enjoy the wonders of being powerful survivors it allows them to enjoy the wonders of conquering abuse by being powerful rescuers too and when the time is right informing their abusers of all this so the abusers can see that there is a clear, bright path to learning, growing and healing no matter how jagged and dark their path has become and that they can also be an advocate for learning, growing and healing too. (Isn't this more rewarding than simply "turning the other cheek" and allowing the abuser to get worse and worse by not teaching them and conquering the abuse?) With this guide, instead of "hurt people hurting other people (and hurting themselves even worse)" there will be more "people who feel special treating other people special." This conversation also includes how there are indications that some of these abuses as shortsighted manipulation tactics were derived from experiments on innocent, unsuspecting, people deceived by parts of the public institutions they trusted (and paid fortunes to under the banners of "education.") These broken parts of these institutions then developed and quietly shared the dark tactics from their research in unconscionable ways. An example of this is dark "studies" on students at imposter parts of Harvard University (by way of Columbia University New York) that were then further perpetuated through Brigham Young University (BYU) and other public and private institutions and organizations (including Stanford.) Basically the "experiments" resulted in "How to be a Spindler as a culture, an institution or an organization without realizing that you will inevitably be conquered in very public ways for being a Spindler." Before this guide immeasurable deception, altered lives, lost opportunity and tragedy for an immeasurable number of victims was the shameful, ongoing, generational result of these "studies" affecting millions upon millions of people. This guide is the light to conquer that darkness. With an invitation from me to these institutions and other institutions who have not allowed parts of their organizations to engage in these criminal abuses, I look forward to us working with the broken parts of these broken institutions to help them fix these unimaginable horrors and to prevent them from ever happening again. For them and for all of us, let's remember: "It's not the mistakes we make but what we do to correct them." And there is still lots of correcting that needs to be done. 18 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 ****** Flexing Your Vocab Alchemy - A process of transformation. Altruism - A person's behaviors regarding their own unique perception of the greater good. Anachronistic - A counterintuitive suggested placing of people, objects, events or customs. Apophenia - Perceiving superficial connections between unrelated things. Asynchronous - Related events, including mechanical, technical, digital, scientific, historical, cultural (or otherwise) and intentional, unintentional or otherwise believed to not have occurred or to be occurring concurrently or simultaneously. Chiasmus - A positive massive action in which words, grammatical constructions, methods, concepts, cultures or civilizations are transformed by being progressively reversed. Intangible - Innate. Inferred. Ability, action, presence or occurrence. Without physical presence. Not being able to be physically touched or grasped. Intro, Outro and Extro - A term I created with the concept (in progress) of providing insight into a person's behaviors regarding their limitless, dynamic and changing perspective of themselves in three ways: 1) Inwardly. 2) Physical presence. 3) In the pursuit of the potential rewards that come from interacting with others. 19 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 Mongering - A deranged behavior by a person or group projecting fear, shame, guilt, misinformation, propaganda and worse towards others. Propoganda - Information, especially of a biased or misleading nature, used to promote or publicize a particular political cause or point of view. Prevaricate - Selective and limited truth telliing rather than intentionally making false statements. Not always done intentioanlly or with malice, Purloin - To take from another without right or without detection. Polymath - A dynamic person with a wide variety of expertise, experience and capability. Treachery -A betrayal of trust; deceptive action or nature. Vox - Voice, vocals. ****** (Has it been 10 minutes yet?) 20 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 PART ONE "THE BOOK OF THE BONE FIRE GIRL" This story will be relayed in modern times by the ghost of Lucy Hill Harris (1792-1836) through an unlikely scribe she discovers named "Vox Chiasmus." We don't know much about Vox other than that he lives in a rusty shack where the different writings from what Lucy communicates to him will eventually fill the walls. Vox is a former test pilot and more than a little eccentric as an intellectual hobbyist with many pursuits. Because of that, snippets from different research books and magazines find their place on the walls of the shack too. One day, Vox meets a concerned, friendly passerby who he eventually shares these writings with and who becomes known as: "The Compiler." The Compiler adds modern day notes. (Usually writings by the compiler are marked with an asterisk. Vox likes to write in alternating Caps-No-Caps-Caps-No-Caps after winning a prize for a mail-in code cracking contest from one of those magazines. That's why some of Vox's short notes are acknowledged in that style of writing. One of the first things Vox tells The Compiler is: "An explorer never steps in the same river twice, for it is not the same river and they are not the same explorer..." Vox also has an old military radio that for some reason only picks up 80's music. Because of that, Vox has put relevant parts of lyrics from 80's 21 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 songs in these writings. The Compiler however sees how some of the lyrics may be code for something wonderful Lucy has shared with Vox. ****** "…words-like-violence…break-the-silence…come-crashing-in…into-my-little- world…painful-to-me…pierce-right-through-me…can't-you-understand…oh-my- little-girl… -DePeChE mOdE, "eNjOy ThE sIlEnCe" It's November 19th, 1823 in one of New England's colonial, patriotic regions. This region was first named Swift's Landing after it's founder General John Swift. The name was transformed to Palmyra back in 1796 in an attempt to court a certain school teacher. By the year 1800 the town had a population of about 1000 spread out over 33 square miles. Tonight, November 19, 1823, it's population is about 3,800 and that is as about as large as it will ever get. The wealthy landowners in the area including the Harris's and the Bradish's have lived here for more than 30 years. They have made Palmyra the region's hub with many invisible spokes in the wheel. This is even though the invisible fires of sectional animosity run rampant through Palmyra, across New England and throughout the failing USA's 24 eastern states. The other residents, newcomers and passersby are restless with their own worry, wonder and hope for which direction The Nation will go...or fall. Those invisible fires are fueled by misinformation, propaganda and lies causing searing seismic flair ups anywhere…and everywhere…at every moment. From the tormented Port of New York with it's growing numbers of street children to the log shacks of the failing Nation's violent frontier just a few hundred miles to the West, the emotions of the shivering masses of resident and immigrant patriots are burned over-and-over again as they relentlessly pursue one flame after another while running from others. 22 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 The most unpredictable among the masses gasp for oxygen in the flair ups while refusing suggestions to simply walk away from the spinning, artificially fueled fires that consume their breath. Their eggplant purple heads always on the verge of exploding at any interaction with anybody. In the darkness, once thriving orchards carefully marked with vine and twine and nourished in rewarding moments between family and friends become divided, conquered, twisted into rubbish and then turned into ash by the bursts of flame allowed to be brought to them. The guiding hand of the Nation's founding brotherhood (for this story known as The Greater Brotherhood) tames some of the flames for a time but clandestine factions within its factions inevitably reignite them. Masses of different musterings under changing names and causes coagulate, collapse, and respawn from moment to moment. Always looking for scent in the pre-modern realities of the time is the beast of heartbreak, loss and pain. It seems almost everyone has lost a child at birth. The beast's piercing, life sucking fangs of violence are never far away. The detours of temptation that it's forked tongue forges to split any path with greasy dark lies are always licking. Hand pieced maps show 24 states constituting what is penciled out as the pigeon holed "United States of America" on the eastern portion of what is a small fraction of a vast continent. The continent named "America," in the early 1500's after Italian mapmaker and explorer Amerigo Vespucci. A little more than a decade after the Genoan Italian Christopher Columbus and 500 years after the Icelandic Leif Erikson. (Many references to Columbus within however with the name Columbia. The same Columbus the country of New Granada will eventually be named after by someone else as Colombia.) On paper, much of the continent's West is known as Mexico Territory. To the North, is British North America. To the East is a vast sea, its coastlines invisible to native born Americans and the memory of those coastlines quickly becoming invisible to the immigrant Americans arriving from them everyday. Those Newcomers fearlessly venturing from invisible places across that sea to get to what they believe will be somewhere less painful then where they were before. Not all of them will make it, old or young. To the South is a vast gulf known as Seno Mexicano (that will eventually be 23 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 named The Gulf of Mexico). Both seas are navigated by wooden sailing ships from all over the globe engaged in trading, slave hauling, mail, transportation, exploration, piracy and war. "theres-no-sense-in-telling-me…the-wisdom-of-the-fool-wont-set-you-free…but- that's-the-way-that-it-goes-and-its-what-nobody-knows…well-every-day-my- confusion-grows" -NeW oRdEr, "BiZzArE lOvE tRiAnGlE" The fledgling, pre-modern "U.S.A." has become nothing more than an unmedicated, pseudoscientific, geographic neosurgery on a continent soon to be taken over in different stages by more traditional nations including Great Britain, France, Spain, Mexico and even Russia. The cultural presences and secret, undermining influences directed by those nations overwhelm section after section regardless of what patriotic anesthesia is being inhaled under the moonlight and exhaled in hypoxic flames of fury by sunrise. Some of those nations are supplying warring Native American tribes near the frontier with high grain alcohol, high caliber guns and low lies to do their frontier fighting against the U.S.A. for them. Wagon train after wagon train of pioneers fearlessly attempting to go into The West from different sections are violently massacred without warning and with survivors left to tell harrowing stories that make many go back searching for those invisible coasts they left. Peaceful Native American tribes, the caretakers of the continent's natural riches and ambassadors of its beauty for centuries, are targeted in the confusion. Parts of The Nation's economy are suckled by the blood from the whipped backs of the men, women and child slaves that fertilize The Nation's well-known tobacco industry. Many don't like to admit this. As bad as things are, it's still going to get much worse. States will eventually be pitted against each other in an attempt by some to create a different Nation from within. More than one million people will be killed 24 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 or wounded in that war. 600,000 fighting for The Nation without slavery. The rest, fighting to keep slavery a self-serving boon. "…I-thought-I-was-mistaken…I-thought-I-heard-your-words…tell-me-how-do-I- feel… tell-me-now-how-do-I-feel…" -nEw OrDeR, "bLuE MOnDaY" On this night, November 19, 1823 in Palmyra, New York, Lucy Hill Harris is now 31 years old. She's 41 year old Martin Harris' first cousin, has been his complicated bride for the past 16 years and has been pregnant at least six times. She will give birth to at least six children that countless newcomers to the region will believe are all Harris' (out of no prevaricating of hers.) Her darlings. For this story, as a New England fall gives way to a New England winter, it is very cold outside. The formidable Harris house her room is in is warm although the house is not comfortable because it was never built to be too comfortable for anyone. Comfort is something that the house's wealthy male owners will never allow. Those owners are 65 year old Nathan Harris (1758-1835) and Martin Harris (1783-1875) his second oldest son. They seem to be driven by a belief that comfort is the enemy of progress. Nathan's oldest son, 42 year old Emer Harris (1781-1869), left Palmyra about 5 years ago and will eventually own and operate lumber mills in other towns as a polygamist. Those lumber mills will one day help build a town in Illinois. Nathan's 3rd oldest son, 38 year old Preserved (1784-1867) is in the region. This colonial house, lit with lamp and candle, heated by fireplace isn't the only house built on the Harris' successful lands though. (*Although Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) is credited by some with discovering electricity in that famous lightning-and-a-kite experiment in 1752 and there's different claims about when light bulbs will be invented and by who sometime after the year 1800, light bulbs won't begin being 25 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 commercialized for about 60 more years. When it comes to heating, even though a colonial era house might have a fireplace or two, most the heat when right up the chimney and because of that there would be days when the rooms of any colonial built residence might still never get above freezing temperatures.) Nathan Harris and his wife Rhoda Lapham Harris (1759-1849) are also parent's to six other grown children. This includes son Solomon (1787- 1828), son Seville (1790-1837), daughter Sophia (1792-1827), daughter Lydia (1793-1901), daughter Naomi (1800-1884) and son Horace (1804-Unknown). In the many generations to come, like other families who will be known to practice polygamy, there will be tens of thousands of people belonging to the "Coat of Harris" regardless of a family member's individual beliefs or practices regarding polygamy and other things throughout the different generations. Many locals would agree that Martin Harris is a walking contradiction. Powerful and talented in many ways but also very volatile to the point of self-destruction. In certain circles of locals, stories of Martin's unmatched capacity for violence upon man and woman will be quietly told. Among the Newcomers, envious stories of Martin's cash, connections and exploits are more common. The facts of those stories becoming more and more diluted with each telling whether it's Martin or a Newcomer telling them. When Lucy was 15, there were other boys and men who she will have thought about marrying but she will know before she is 15 that Martin Harris gets what he wants when he wants it and she will know that she doesn't have a choice in the matter if she wants to live past age 15 and for her family to be left unharmed. On this night, she resigns herself to a dark corner of the main room of the house. The light from the fireplace This room is drenched in Martin's collection of patriotic regalia. This includes war relics and other items celebrating his perspective of The Greater Brotherhood and The Nation. Adorning the log walls of the room are different flags sewn by different people with the intention of bringing the failing Nation together in different ways over the past five unpredictable decades. Some have different numbers of stars and stripes. Some are more worn than others. 26 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 Some have different stains on them. They are not all the same size. Martin collected some of them during his different times with the military during the nearby War of 1812 (1812-1815). A peculiar, indirect connection of Martin's through some of the men who visit him is Paul Revere (1735-1818). Revere will have a reputation that to many will be reduced to him being just a fearlessly patriotic, 41 year old nighttime rider warning colonists that "the British are coming!" on the night of April 18, 1775. However, Revere will also be an artisan, a map maker, a master metalsmith, an engraver, an iron strong entrepreneur credited with birthing the U.S. copper industry and, like other patriotically notable people, a member of The Greater Brotherhood. Items of different shapes, sizes and uses made from vastly different metals including iron, copper, brass, silver and gold by Revere & Sons that have come into Martin's possession over the years are on some of the shelves in this room. Other experimental items that will be made by the Revere's including breastplates, spheres, swords and engravings on thin copper sheets polished so well they look like gold in the light of a candle are hidden and locked away in Martin's office. The spherical kettle Lucy will use later tonight will be made by carefully taught workers in Revere's busy metal foundry. Countless people will also see the renowned quality of Revere's engravings from the literary and imagery prints those engravings will be used to make in newspapers printed throughout New England and beyond. It was also copper sheets from Revere & Sons copper mill that protected the hull of the USS Constitution through the War of 1812 as well as the hull's of some of The Nation's other wooden ships when fighting seemed purposeful and not futile like it does in different parts now because of what is happening in the different parts of The Nation. Revere passed away about 5 years ago in 1818 at the age of 83. Of his 16 children from two sequential wives (Sarah Orne Revere (1736-1773) and Rachel Walker Revere (1745-1813) 11 lived to adulthood. Half-brother sons Paul Jr. (1760-1813) and Joseph (1777-1868) continued Revere's manufacturing legacy. They also continued many of Revere's patriotic stories including stories of The Greater Brotherhood. One story Paul Revere often shared was about another well known member of The Greater Brotherhood named Captain James Cook (1728- 27 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 1779.) Cook was an explorer, navigator, cartographer and captain in the British Royal Navy who discovered Hawaii in 1778. (Revere would have been 43 at the time.) In his time there, Cook and other members of The Greater Brotherhood documented many large native islander families with children birthed by one father and several mothers. Many mothers had more than a dozen children and many of those mothers were not much more than a dozen years older than their first child. This generational practice of growing the island's isolated populations was credited in many ways for the isolated island nation thriving. Cook, who was a prolific explorer, was killed in a fight with some of the islanders only a year after discovering the islands. He was 51 years old. (*For readers, out of no fault of their own, who might be unaware of the status of travel, commerce and communication around the globe in the late 1700's and early 1800's…In 1820, 32 years after the islands were discovered by Cook (by sailboat from Great Britain), the figurehead and less than noble island king of Hawaii named Kamehameha II (born Liholiho) got word in the islands of a yacht for sale by a shipbuilding titan in New York City operated by a well connected New England family with the last name of Crowninshield. Depending on what modern day equivalents are used to convert Hawaii's valuable sandalwood of the time to U.S. dollars of today, the portion of the island's fortune the often drunken figurehead king paid for the yacht could have been more than ten million dollars. (KKII was the son of the noble, island conquering KKI but after KKI's death in 1819 one of KKI's wives assumed control but allowed KKII to be the figurehead "king.") After the purchase and transfer to the islands, the yacht was not maintained and eventually started to rot but was then ordered by KKII to be repaired with wood shipped in from the Northwest of the American Continent and what was then New Spain (what would eventually become part of California), part of the British colonies (along the West Coast) or land temporarily claimed by Russia (also along the West Coast). Within a few years of repair, KKII ordered the yacht to sail from one island to another in the middle of a violent storm and it sank with more than 1,000 artifacts and island treasures aboard. (In 2015 the yacht's wreck 28 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 was located by researchers and the artifacts were eventually recovered and returned to the State of Hawaii.) In 1824 KKII and one of his five wives (who was also his half-sister) died from measles in Great Britain while on an ill advised months long trip there from the Hawaiian islands. (Likely an attempt to court the "king" to commit the island kingdom to Great Britain.) *It's also important to share this note about Hawaii here because of parts of Mormonism's far reaching connections to the Hawaiian Islands and Polynesia in modern times.) Although the islanders familial practice was already known as "polygamy" since 1591 and was engaged in throughout dozens of other isolated countries and cultures around the globe, for this story, as other ships continued to transverse the globe, those stories of those island kingdoms and their isolated but thriving populations were told and retold and made their way to New England and to The Greater Brotherhood's different factions. Upon hearing the stories of the thriving island populations, some faction members suggested that if a man isn't involved in the fathering and rearing of many children with more than one willing wife then he is not building the nation he claims to belong to... Other relics in Martin's possession include a one-of-a-kind "Turkish Pass" that came through that childhood friend of Martin's that former Palmyra resident Luther Bradish (1783-1863.) (A "Turkish Pass" was a unique Turkish passport with several unique characters and shapes on it that would be very unusual to those on the American continent.) Bradish is currently in the Turkish region for a few years as a special agent on assignment for President Monroe to attempt to reduce the number of Turkish pirate attacks on American ships in the Mediterranean. Bradish is also believed to be the first "natural born" U.S. Citizen to travel in some of those parts of the globe. (He also knows President Madison and future president John Q. Adams.) Other relics in the room came through Samuel Latham Mitchill (1764- 1831) who lives in New York City and who Martin came to know through Bradish. (President Jefferson once described Mitchill as a "living encyclopedia," "a chaos of knowledge," and "the most publicly universal 29 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 gentleman." Dr. J. W. Francis would call him "The Nestor of American Science." Mitchill also knows President Madison. He is also a true polymath and among many other wonders was also involved in the construction of the Erie Canal. Because of that, he will come to Palmyra regularly during the planning and construction process and for this story will almost always have something for Martin.) Other items in the room come from some of the other men who visit. Not all of the men really know Martin or what he is capable of though including Bradish and Mitchill… Bradish, Mitchill and others who will be mentioned and many other patriots of the time have connections to Columbia College (New York.) Neither of these two men are in the room on this night though. (*Columbia University New York was founded in 1754 as Kings College, then renamed Columbia College. A different Columbia College was founded in Columbia, Missouri in 1851. Ironically, in modern times, Columbia University also has a branch in New York referred to as Columbia College. Like other universities and colleges counterintuitively allowed to operate under similar names, they are different and it's important to be aware of the differences. In this guide, all related references are to Kings College/Columbia College/Columbia University New York) As Lucy wait's out of sight in the darkened corner of the room, she hears the usual commotion of Martin arriving outside with his regular men but this time some of the other men who visit are also with him. The sounds of the uniquely bred, magnificent Clydesdale horses from that the men use to pull the secret heavy loads of their wagons are unmistakable to Lucy. The silky black coat and long flowing mane and tail of the Friesian Martin rides (like Clydesdales, also from Scotland) are unmistakable to everybody. One by one the men make their way into the room to wait for Martin. None of them will pay any attention to Lucy as usual, writing her off as Martin's inconsequential, half-deaf, troubled wife. Much more than that though, again, this will allow her to see and hear things that should have been done in secret… The stench of stolen slave blood carried by the smoke of a certain type of tobacco fills the room as match flame is brought to pipe by some of 30 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 the men. Snow from the men's boots, coats and hats falls to the floor and melts away in an invisible vapor leaving no trace they were here…or there. The sounds of Martin being escorted up the steps echoes throughout the house. The door is opened for him to enter. A supernatural silence settles over the room as he enters. He walks as if a seismic thunderstorm has just ended and a sonic chariot of gold ferried by flying herculean goddesses is ushering him threw billowing arches of victory. In the room, his footsteps cannot be heard, unlike the others when they came in. Martin's eyes are lit with the kind of fire that Lucy has only seen when he takes her. A few of the other men who she doesn't recognize are still breathing heavy, deep breaths. Martin is not. The noises of those unmistakable horses left in the darkness reminds Lucy that there will always be things she doesn't want to know about Martin…or would ever dare to. From some of the violent stories she's overheard, it's impossible to tell which killings of his were during the war (and turned into a sport or a theatrical performance) and which killings might have been carefully ordered outside of the war to be kept hidden as a compelling oath of secrecy among him and some of the others. Whispers about Martin's smeared, altruistic reasoning have given clues to some of them. Dark, foggy reasoning that will one day wind into a siphoning black vine spliced into six dark stems with one of the stems spawning fifteen blackening, spinning sunflowers wormed in and out of a purloined, sparkling, red- white-and-blue vase seeped with generations of blood-sweat-and-tears syringed from the black vine's exploited victims prevaricated in many ways and made desperate to try to seep from the vase. Of those 15 spinning sunflowers, like any bouquet, an order among them will be arranged. One of those spinning sunflowers spinning the fastest, two spinning faster than the other 12 and the other 12 just spinning. On this night, this killing is different though. This time there will be no brushing the killing aside. This time there will be no misdirection and accusations of others. Martin made no mistake about that. This time, all of the men in the room know exactly who did what and why. He made sure they all know. 31 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 Out of their belief in him or out of their fear of him for their own lives and the lives of their families should they ever tell what they now know, they will tell no one…again. Neither will Lucy. (Her darlings.) Tonight, just weeks before Joseph Jr. turns 18 on December 23, 1823, Alvin Smith, the 25-year-old headstrong, newcomer Palmyra resident who many knew well and who Martin once adored, now lay dead in the Smith's shack just over a mile away. Murdered by Martin's orders. Three year old little Lucy Smith refusing to leave her oldest brother's side calling "Amby! Amby! Amby!" before being pulled away by a grief stricken sibling. Alvin's fiancé also being found on the floor next to him, lying in a heap sobbing. The rest of the Smiths grieving themselves to sleep refusing to believe that another near frontier American dream has ended in the invisible, defenseless murder of an innocent person. More aware than the others, during the night, 17 year old Joseph will bravely dress and leave the shack to go into the white cold New England darkness alone. With the limp that he has had since that agonizing, primitively tooled, leg "surgery" in his earlier childhood, he will begin his frigid hobble towards that room to make that deal with Martin just like Lucy did. That deal that no child should ever be forced to make. Lucy will also see again that with Joseph, a child, like she was, Martin holds no bones about using threat, force or fear to force a child to fulfill his spinning desires. For this story, like other females in the region and many of those females who have passed through Palmyra, Lucy was also well aware of that nearby shack and the different uses it served for Harris and his associates long before it was bartered to the traveling Smith family. "…so-needless-to-say…I'm-odds-and-ends…but-I'll-be-stumbling- anyway…slowly-learning-that-life-is-okay…say-after-me…It's-no-better-to-be- safe-than-sorry…" -A-hA, "tAkE oN mE" When the Smiths arrived in Palmyra in 1816 there were just nineteen "states" penciled out making up the countless different choirs chanting their own sparkling, siren song for The Nation. Over the next five years, The Greater Brotherhood would see to it that five other states will be 32 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 penciled out bringing that number to 24 by this night in 1823. Then, the eventual drought of forming no states that The Greater Brotherhood feared could happen will begin. "…high-time-we-made-a-stand…and-shook-up-the-views-of-the-common- man…and-the-lovetrain-rides-from-coast-to-coast…d.j.'s-the-man-we-love-the- most…could-you-be-could-you-be-squeaky-clean…and-smash-any-hope-of- democracy…" -TeArS fOr FeArS, "SeEdS Of LoVe" Across New England and the handful of other states making up the illusion of The Nation, certain circles know that different factions of The Greater Brotherhood exist and that many of them have their own secret versions of The Greater Brotherhood's plan to save the failing Nation. A plan that involves the manifestation of a large following of people that can be led to finally pave the way through the impassable violent frontier and deep into the center of the West to colonize the western part of the continent before The Nation falls. The waiting, differently flagged beasts of those countries that have already claimed those far more vast parts of the American Continent on paper wait. With their leap comes the imminent dissection and consumption of The Nation. That sparkling siren song to be serrated into sections like corn holed sitting ducks more vulnerable than a corn moonshine kernelled Sitting Bull. A dozen or so different but similar iterations of The Greater Brotherhood's, secret plan to save the failed Nation so far have all involved someone telling a story about angels and that listeners should follow the storyteller. But one after another they have failed to gain momentum. Tonight however, Lucy and the others in the room will finally know why the manifestation of that following hasn't happened yet and why The Nation continues to fall because of it. Tonight, they will all know that it's because no one who has been a part of any of those other stories was willing to do what Martin has done to 33 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 Alvin and then to Joseph Jr. and that Martin will continue doing to him: That is, to use a child as the figurehead and voice of the manifestation instead of a grown up. Tonight, and with the Erie Canal on the verge of completion, they will all hear what Martin has known all along: That he is also the only one who will come into possession of all six of those most critical, most undeniable, secret intangibles. To Martin, time is of the essence now. For the next two decades there will never be enough time. For this story, for those who Martin winds himself around the tightest, the fatal fang skewering of Alvin is suffocating because Martin used to slither from place to place telling certain subordinates about Alvin being the songbird of the sparkling siren song he would begin conducting for The Nation one day soon. For this story, Martin claimed on some occasions that this is what the chatty deer told him... Had Alvin not deviated from Martin's plan four years ago and had not in recent weeks began interfering with Martin's four years of privately and publicly grooming Joseph, things would have gone very differently for Alvin. Alving would have been the one to eventually receive Martin's order to lead followers deep into The West with the idea they would be headed to the warm West Coast but under that secret plan to stop at a certain valley in a string of valleys in the mountains in the strategic center of The High West of the American Continent. "…once-I-had-a-love-and-it-was-a-gas…soon-turned-out-had-a-heart-of- glass…seemed-like-the-real-thing…only-to-find…mucho-mistrust…loves-gone- blind" -BlOnDiE, "HeArT oF gLaSs" During this night, Lucy remembers back to when she was 15 and the relief she finally felt when she was informed by one of Martin's men that she will now be Martin's "wife" and that she need not worry about her family's safety in exchange for what will be her continued compliance to his wishes and uses for her, day and night, here and there, for him and for other men. 34 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 She remembers through this, and with no other resources for help available to her in the pre-modern times, her intellect, her ability to read and write and her pursuits will contribute to allowing her influence over Martin in a profound way (especially when it comes to something she will read in the Bible and then whisper into Martin's ear in 1828.) She also remembers putting her energies back into the many things she loves. She loves to learn and to read and to write. She loves music. She loves writing lyrics of songs she hears. She loves writing her own songs. She loves to write down her observations. She loves to write down her ideas. She loves to write lists. Lists of what the sun grows including fruits, vegetables, trees, flowers and plants. Lists of stars. Lists of minerals and rocks. Lists of lakes and rivers. Lists of animals she will see or want to see. Lists of interesting boys and men and what they do that amuses her. Lists of girls and women and what they do that inspire her. Lists of anyone or anything that makes her uncomfortable, scares her or hurts her. Lists of questions she wants to ask others. Lists of challenges different people have encountered on their ways. Lists of what she has learned on her way. She remembers that she loves sunshine and breathing deep breaths in the forest, near a river, in a lake and in a busy kitchen. She feels it's important to consider the challenges others might have encountered on their ways because it provides insight into some of the reasons for some of what they do. She knows that other's ways may take them through challenges so unimaginably horrible that only other people who go through similar challenges will be able to imagine them. She will also be faced with the overwhelming challenges of being deaf in one ear. For this story, this is from Martin yelling at her loud and often in addition to beating her. On one occasion a report about Martin beating Lucy with a whip will be filed with the constable but Martin won't face any consequences for it. She will also notice many people who have their portraits painted or their photographs taken at times but any images of Joseph Smith in particular will seem to disappear, like other things, including those 5 books. Some of these people who's pictures will be available will be: 35 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 -Alvin Smith -Hyrum Smith -Sophronia Smith Stoddard McCleary (Joseph's older sister) -Samuel Smith -William Smith -Katherine Smith Salisbury (Joseph's second younger sister) -Don Carlos Smith -Lucy Smith Milikin (Joseph's youngest sister) -Arthur Milikin (Lucy's husband) -Emma Hale Smith Bidamon -Lewis Bidamon -David Whitmer -Peter Whitmer Sr. -Oliver Cowdery -James Strang -William Morgan -Sidney Rigdon -U.S. Supreme Court Associate Judge Orson Hyde -Parley P. Pratt -Orson Pratt -William Clayton -Egbert B. Grandin As well as images of far more visible people including: -Luther Bradish -Samuel Latham Mitchill -Charles Anthon -James Fenimore Cooper. -Henri Le Rennet -All the Presidents And others not associated with the beginnings of Mormonism including: Charles Darwin (1809-1882) Age 73. P.T. Barnum (1810-1891) Age 81. 36 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 Charles Dickens (1812-1870) Age 58. Frederick Douglass (1818-1895) Age 72. Queen Victoria (1819-1901) Age 81 Harriet Tubman (1820-1913) Age 93. Florence Nightingale (1820-1910) Age 90. Susan B. Anthony (1820-1906) Age 84. Louis Vuitton (1821-1892) Age 71. (*This even though a counterintuitively prevaricated, forensically validated image of Joseph Smith it will be found in a book titled "Millions Shall Know Brother Joseph Again" by Shannon Michael Tracy, page 138. It will be suggested that this image of Joseph Smith also resembles the images of his brothers, sisters and of his son Joseph Smith III more so than any other image so far whether it be cartoon or claimed daguerreotype. (This link is included in the list of links.) A story of the image also being discovered and presented in 1969 will also be recorded in parts of Mormonism.) (Instead, the collective nostalgia of The Hatch will perpetuate and sensationalize far more flattering, different cartoon images of Joseph. Countless framed prints of these images will hang in followers homes around the globe after being bought any of the hundreds of stores The Hath will own (or online.) "…I've-been-looking-so-long-at-these-pictures-of-you…that-I-almost-believe-that- they're-real…I've-been-living-so-long-with-my-pictures-of-you…that-I-almost- believe-that-the-pictures-are-all-I-can-feel…" -ThE cUrE, "pIcTuReS oF yOu" (*Of all the images of the other people mentioned, none will appear more contrasted to the contributions they made than the Wikipedia image of James Fenimore Cooper in 1850 less than a year before he passed away (on the day before his 62nd birthday. Forlorn, consternation and tongue tied are just a few of the words that might begin to describe it.) 37 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 Lucy will also see that Martin is many things: Wealthy. Well- connected. Talented. Dynamic. Zealously patriotic. Darkly altruistic. Violent. Delusional. Easily provoked but debonair even though some of his habits would seem to prevent that. "…high-hats-and-arrow-collars…white-spats-and-lots-of-dollars… spending-every-dime-for-a-wonderful-time…" -TaCo, "PuTtIn On ThE rItZ" Lucy will see that Martin will convince others to donate cash for different causes including what he will claim is to help the Greeks fight the Turks. She will see that he will leave the Harris' successful operations for weeks at a time for what he claims is to join the army fighting the British in the nearby War of 1812. (He will be invited to be a decorated veteran at wars end in 1815.) She will see that he will craft a way to make such fine white linen from flax grown on the Harris' productive lands that he will win nearly a dozen awards over two straight years. Because of this he will be passionate about the art of tailoring and making clothing. When he chooses to be he will be very well dressed and ornamented himself. She will see him claim that an angel once appeared to him in the form of a talking deer and walked with him for a few miles. She will see him use secret codes that he will steal or create himself to communicate with his men, the men who visit and others. She will see that he will use a cane with a snake's head. (For this story this may be because in 1754 multiple newspaper owner, statesmen, oligarch and inventor Benjamin Franklin will publish what will become the famous "Join Or Die" cartoon image featuring a snake representing the 8 divided colonies of that time. It will be suggested that, to colonists, snakes will be a symbol of rejuvenation because they shed their skin…or…to join the snake or die.) 38 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 She will see that he will secretly stage public interactions with Joseph for newcomers to observe. This will include buying Joseph expensive suits or having people witness Martin giving Joseph silver pieces worth enough to buy whatever one might think he needs for weeks at a time. She will see him publicly claim to Newcomers to have faithfully "invested" that fortune for printing that compilation of Joseph's on E.B. Grandin's printing press (although for many reasons Palmyra locals will refuse to buy it.) She will see him influence Newcomers into buying and wearing undergarments made from his white linen as a symbol of their commitment to following Joseph's counterintuitive work. She will see him reciprocate large portions of the those endless wheel's of cash right back to unfathomable extremes for his hijacked plan. A plan that will be too much of many things but that will ultimately save The Nation because those plans of other factions and factions within factions using a grown up as their figurehead and voice will fail. She will see his careful splicing of events will result in parts of his Black Vine's written history somehow portraying him as that poor, humble farmer, with the misfortune of marrying her a greedy, disobedient, "hostile" wife who wasn't worthy of him. Eventually, night after night she will watch Martin stand by the large stone fireplace in the Harris' formidable residence and dazzle roomful after roomful of Newcomers with stories of what he believes The Nation can be. Sometimes, some of the men who visit will blend in to quietly observe. More Newcomers will have arrived that day. After the completion of the Erie Canal, endless lines of them will float in on one of the Harris' several barges returning to Palmyra after delivering goods to be sold in New York City and beyond. As Lucy watches Martin tell his stories in the ways he tells them, his hijacked version of The Greater Brotherhood's vision for The Nation (his most magical mystical mistress), is one dripping from visible wet coast to invisible wet West Coast covered with golden roses suckling from all manner of industry. The wealthy Martin pretends the bounties to be gotten are for every Newcomer man, woman and child who dares reach out and take what the amber waves of grain and purple mountain majesties to The West will offer them too (not just him…) 39 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23 During his performance, the fire in the fireplace turns into a raging river of liquid gold filling the room and drowning with ecstasy any question a weary, hungry, fearless Newcomer might have foolishly arrived at Martin's doorstep with. The log roof, walls and floor of the room blossom into soft golden pillows. The rocks of the fireplace burst their shells and reveal massive twirling diamonds hypnotizing the Newcomers wide eyes with a kaleidoscope of twinkling lights. The Newcomers hand sewn, worn thin, patched up shirts and pants turn into freshly minted, sparking, red-white-and-blue, starred-and-striped, suits and top hats. Pinned together, stained field dresses turn into bright golden ruffle and laced fringed ball room gowns. Ivory tipped batons fall from the sky. Endless bushels of mamma's milk fed babies swallowed up in bison fur diapers and playing double-neck-eee-lek-trek guitars bounce from under the ruffles of those golden gowns. The men who visit grease the brass door knobs and shake double fisted redwood rattles in a marching beat. The candles burst with gold scented olive oil love light. The mantle becomes a keyboard where Martin's huge hands helm the biggest pipe organ known to man. His clay bottom boots pound the wooden floor like thunder driven kick drums. Martin's own mechanical voice turns into the voice of an angel for the power ballad. Sparks rocket from each baby's guitars as they strum their own version of the notes of that famous patriotic anthem written during Martin's time at war by Francis Scott Key. Every school bell from Palmyra to Washington D.C. chimes with agreement, each school's selectively emptied library becoming an endless amplifier for the chimes. Before the sparks stop spraying, Martin fires several of his black powder pistols into the air in a booming, blazing, gunpowder smoke filled Grand Finale. When the six shooter is invented in 1836, tales of his two-handed Grand Finale's will be told around the globe. "I-saw-your-eyes…and-you-made-me-smile…for-a-little-while…I-was-falling-in- love" - A fLoCk oF sEaGuLls, "SpAcE aGe LoVeSoNg" No matter how sore every part of her body will be at times from being the nearest object in Martin's spinning desires and often provoked rage and no matter how much she will fear him, in those moments, Martin 40 SECRET NOT SECRET.ORG 5.20.23