Log In Clara Dillingham (abt. 1821 - 1911) Born about 1821 [uncertain] in Tennessee, United States Died 8 Mar 1911 at about age 90 in Grayson, Texas, United States Family Ancestors Descendants Problems or Questions? Biography Father named Tom. Research Notes Clara Dillingham Daughter of [father unknown] and [mother unknown] [spouse(s) unknown] Mother of Clancy Dillingham, Willis Dillingham, Mariah Dillingham, Georgia Dillingham, Fannie Dillingham, Patsey Dillingham and Charles Dillingham Pro le manager: Melanie Paul Last modi ed 9 May 2023 • Created 14 Jun 2020 Clara Dillingham is a part of US Black heritage. Family Search has Clara married to James Carr Dillingham in 1839. I am having great di culty accepting that a white man would marry a Black, or Colored, woman in the 1830's. Plus 7 of her children, supposedly all with James Carr Dillingham, were born after he married Marion Isabella Hopkins in 1850 (on whom he fathered some 13 children). FS also has James Carr Dillingham partnered with an "unknown slave". I tend to think that Clara was that enslaved person. Paul-5413 06:04, 24 February 2021 (UTC) Points to Ponder 1. Without some kind of proof, naming James Carr Dillingham as the father of the 9 children ascribed to Clara is speculation at best -- based on that they have the same last name, a statement "father's name was Jim", and that J C Dillingham was known as "Jim". 2. There is not, really, anything to prove that the children listed as Clara's, were even (all / any) her birth children. Many Emancipated persons grouped themselves together in family groups, even when not related by blood; older women becoming "mother" to parentless children, and so on. 3. There is not even any real proof that Dillingham was even the enslaver of this Black family -- just that they are linked together on Family Search (and Clara is stated to be his wife on Find a Grave); and that they have the same last name. 4. The earliest records thus far found, census-wise, do NOT name the enslaved listed in J C Dillingham's enumeration -- just age, sex, and colour. And the ages, and numbers, do NOT match Clara and her children. 5. After Emancipation, there is NOTHING thus far found that links these two families, except the last name Dillingham, and that the father of the children (or some of them) was named "Jim". There must have been HUNDREDS of white men named "Jim" who fathered children on Black, or Mulatto (or other degrees of Coloured) women. For that matter, there would also have been hundreds (thousands?!) of Black / Coloured men named "Jim". . That Clara's death certi cate names her "Widow" and "Mrs Clara Dillingham" is also NOT PROOF of anything except that she claimed to be a widow (many, many, many, MANY did that) and used the pre x "Mrs" at some point -- or her children used it for her. 7. How much do we rely on lack of records to go along with something that may not be fact? How can we prove that one thing is fact, and another merely internet speculation? . Marriage was not necessarily seen by the folk back then the way we see it -- and poorer Blacks, in particular, were likely to simply "end" a marriage without the legal niceties of divorce, because of the legal costs involved. So many "second marriages" were either Common Law, or Bigamous, for that reason. 9. There is, thus far, no proof that Clara was married at all, let alone to a white man in 1839, and still having children to him after he legally married a white woman and was having children with her. Now, what is very probable is a "slave holder/owner" (whatever the terminology that was used back in the 1830s-1860s) having his way with his female "property" even while married -- and especially when his legal wife was pregnant and unable to "accommodate his needs". 10. It is not known if the "father named Tom" was white, or Black, so the last name "Dillingham" given to him may not be factual. All the above10 "points to ponder" are from the tortured brain of me: Mel Paul 06:17, 25 February 2021 (UTC) in the hope that someone else may follow where I've been thinking, and offer some new thoughts, a possible lead, or a de nite conclusion. Sources Find a Grave, database and images (accessed 14 June 2020), memorial page for Clara Dillingham Dillingham (1821–8 Mar 1911), Find A Grave: Memorial #116127625, citing West Hill Cemetery, Sherman, Grayson County, Texas, USA ; Maintained by Lisa (contributor 48215041). Sponsored Search We found records about Clara Dillingham (10,000+) Birth Records (10,000+) Marriage & Divorce (10,000+) Death, Burial Cemetery & Obituaries (10,000+) Census & Voter Lists Total records 10,0000+ View all Photos of Clara: 1 Sponsored Search by Ancestry.com Clara Dillingham Search Records Sponsored Search by Ancestry.com Clara (1/1) Female Silhouette with Turban Clara Dillingham (abt.1821-1911), ADWPprimaries, Verna Hattie (Haliburton) Mangum (1902- 2001), Catherine (Gibbons) Walker (1879- 1944), Esther E Gregory (1914-1929), Jane Elizabeth (Adams) Harris (1905-1976). full 420x420 image details Is Clara your ancestor? Please don't go away! Login (free, instant) to comment or collaborate with our community of genealogists to make Clara Dillingham's pro le the best it can be. At least contact the pro le manager. Thank you! Dillingham Search Records Comments Leave a message for others who see this pro le. There are no comments yet. Explore More: Felix G. Dillingham (abt.1835-) • Joseph M. Dillingham (abt.1837-) • H. Britt Dillingham (1844-1926) • Charles Uhlan Dillingham (1880-1959) • Charles Henry Dillingham (1890-1957) • Neoma (Dillingham) Mashburn (1892-1968) • Ann (Dillingham) Blair (abt.1815-) • Grover Cleveland Dillingham (1892-1963) • John Nathan Dillingham (1852-1931) • John Benjamin Dillingham (1890- 1980) • Frederic Winn Dillingham (1895-1967) • John Long Dillingham (1808-bef.1870) • Nora Gertrude (Dillingham) Neil (1891-1924) • Mary Elizabeth (Dillingham) Garrett (1829-1910) • Dica (Dillingham) Wilkinson (1888-) • Blanche Hutton (Dillingham) Thompson (1888-1960) • Vachel Dillingham (abt.1804-1840) • Carl Edwin Dillingham (1890-1952) • Agnes (Dillingham) Lynn (1892- 1965) Black History Connection Checkers: Clara is 22 degrees from Booker T. Washington, 19 degrees from Muhammad Ali, 28 degrees from Maya Angelou, 26 degrees from Ernie Banks, 27 degrees from Aretha Franklin, 26 degrees from Henry Louis Gates, 23 degrees from Althea Gibson, 21 degrees from Arthur Gregg, 22 degrees from Langston Hughes, 27 degrees from Rosa Parks, 28 degrees from Sidney Poitier and 27 degrees from Sojourner Truth Login to nd your connection. Categories: USBH Heritage Exchange, Linked | USBH Heritage Exchange, Status Unknown | Grayson County, Texas | West Hill Cemetery, Sherman, Texas WikiTree > D > Dillingham > Clara Dillingham This page has been accessed 242 times. A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z WikiTree Home About G2G Forum Help Search Important privacy notice & disclaimer: You have a responsibility to use caution when distributing private information. WikiTree protects most sensitive information but only to the extent stated in the Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. © 2008 - 2026 The WikiTree Company. Content may be copyrighted by WikiTree community members.